microMussel Super-Sprint Triathlon

Friday, July 14, 2017 - 7:00 pm
100 yard swim - 0.4 mile bike - 0.2 mile run (or thereabouts)
In 2010, Musselman first staged microMussel (µMussel because we're into tiny), a Super-Sprint triathlon the likes of which you'd not seen before. Returning and once again held Friday evening, µMussel features absurdly short distances over a closed, spectator-friendly course through Geneva's Lakefront Park.

One waves will be staged for 2017. Everyone starts in a single chaotic mass of humanity and must ride an unmodified children's tricycle (with or without bell) or Big Wheels for the bike portion. A panel of biased and bribed judges reserves the right to disqualify egregious entries.

  • Register during online registration (either as an add-on to another race).
  • Cost is $20 and includes chip timing (total time only; no splits).
  • Overall champion, male or female, first across the finish line of (tricycles) will win $100 AND be declared the Undisputed Undeniable MicroMussel Super-Sprint Champion of the Universe.
  • Prizes also awards for best team costume and individual costume
Swim (100 yards) (or so)

Take a flying leap off the dock and start churning. A few seconds later, if all goes well, you'll come ashore at the boat launch.

Behold the interactive map.

Bike (0.4 miles) (roughly)

What to wear? That's the big question. Don't think about it too long, because you've only got a single loop of Lakefront Park to spin your pedals.

Behold the interactive map.

Run (0.2 miles) (give or take)

Ditch the bike and dash for the finish line, oxygen-starved and cramping like there's no tomorrow. Because in this race, there isn't. Please wear your helmet so we can all have a good chuckle.

Behold the interactive map.